Blog

5 ways to deal with people who hit your buttons

We all know people who wind us up, make us feel small, angry or useless, even over small things. The impact can be a minor niggle, ruin our day or ruin a relationship! It might feel like these reactions are out of your control but the good news is there are ways to minimise the impact and deal with differently. Here are our top tips:

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How to deal with Blame Games

Have you ever wondered how to end ‘blame game’ behaviour at work? Here are the top tips from the experts:

Eleanor Shakiba; author of Difficult People Made Easy

When blame game tactics are at play, you’re likely to find lots of ‘us and them’ style stories being told. Employees who tell these stories usually cast themselves as victims and maintain that their ‘difficult co-workers’ are persecutors. If managers or team leaders step into rescuer roles, the blame game will continue. So it’s important that managers and supervisors remain neutral and objective. One way to do this is by reframing the issue:

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Are you giving people the wrong message when you say you’re ‘busy’?

“Busy” has become a word so packed with meaning in social circumstances, it has become has common a response as ‘fine’ to the question ‘How are you?’. Habitual it might be but are you telling people what you really want to when you use this in conversation? Busy can be a positive thing, if you are busy doing the things you want to do with your life. If your business has been quiet and now it’s ‘busy’ that’s good. Be careful though of using it as a standard response because when you describe yourself as busy, you are potentially communicating to yourself and other people one or more of the following:

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Why people don't listen to you

It’s a frustrating situation. You’re sharing advice or giving instructions and the other person just isn’t listening. Why does this happen? How can you engage others, so they really want to listen? Here are the top tips from our panel:

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Multi Tasking could actually be slowing you down

Your brain can only focus on one thing at a time. What is called multi-tasking is actually your brain flicking from one thing to another so that each task gets a bit of your attention and the processing power of your brain. You will divide your focus over a number of things and none of them will get your full attention. When someone thinks they are multi-tasking their brain is actually trying to track a number of different thoughts and activities in their mind at the same time. This drains your energy and reduces your thinking capacity. People multi task because it ‘feels’ productive, rather than an objective analysis of results and output.

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5 Effective Ways to deal with critical people

Do you ever feel like you have to over justify yourself or defend yourself against petty gripes and accusations? Some people can be naturally over critical. This creates an atmosphere of constant defensiveness which can destroy relationships, not to mention your self confidence if you have someone close or work with someone who is like this. Get yourself out of the corner you feel backed into and avoid getting drawn into the negativity with our top tips:

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Are you working with a Psychopath?

When we hear the word Psychopath we commonly think of mass murderers and other criminal elements. Did you know that people with psychopathic tendencies make up 1 to 2 percent of the population? We encounter them frequently in our lives and they are particularly well designed for high power corporate positions! Not naming any names of course but we have probably seen a number of them in the news recently.
Lets look at some of the characteristics of psychopaths:

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Turn sloppy thinking into strategic thinking

You’ve been told you need to think more ‘strategically’. But what does this really mean and can you do it?

A strategy is simply a series of tasks, outputs or actions in the service of achieving a particular outcome. Not hard right? So how come so many of us struggle with it? If you want to improve your strategic thinking skills, here are the top tips from the experts:

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3 ways to stop boundary violators at work

Beware the boundary violators - we all know them, the space invaders and the time suckers. They waste your time, make you feel uncomfortable and seem to make you say and do things you don’t want to.

 A lot of people have issues with setting and maintaining boundaries with others. Boundaries are the physical, mental and emotion ‘line’ between us and other people. Some people’s boundaries are too rigid and they push people away and some are too sloppy and this allows other people to violate their boundaries and get into their personal space. The good news is that once you are aware you can do something to enforce your boundaries and teach others to treat you appropriately. Here’s some top tips:

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Making change stick – A Leaders Guide

For many organisations, change is neither desirable nor simple. How can you help your people feel in control during times of transition? How can you minimise the ‘loss’ which often comes with change? What can you do to reduce conflict and build healthy teams, even when the rate of change keeps increasing? What behaviours help people thrive during change? Use these top tips from the experts:

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How do Power Dynamics impact you at work?

For many organisations, change is neither desirable nor simple. How can you help your people feel in control during times of transition? How can you minimise the ‘loss’ which often comes with change? What can you do to reduce conflict and build healthy teams, even when the rate of change keeps increasing? What behaviours help people thrive during change? Use these top tips from the experts:

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How Healthy are your Workplace Relationships?

When Andy Cohen Wray begin learning NLP 18 months ago, none of us knew where it would take him. Working for Heathrow Airport at the time, Andy was a keen sportsman and had done some hurdling competitions, deep in the back of his mind though was an idea. Fascinated by the psychology of sports people, Andy had a dream to run his own business, coaching runners and professional athletes to get their minds in shape for their best performance in the sport they loved.

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Build your Team’s Problem Solving Skills

There are three main skill sets that ensure success in business: people skills, technology skills and problem-solving skills.
Problem-solving is a high level thinking skill. It involves accurately assessing an issue, identifying potential solutions and choosing the most effective solutions to implement. Building the problem solving skills of your team benefits your business by boosting productivity, improving teamwork and giving your team the ability to deliver results which stand out from the norm.

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Can you repair toxic teams?

Toxic team dynamics are behavioural or communication patterns which destroy a healthy workplace. Key signs of a toxic team are:

  • Lack of productivity and progress
  • Leaders draining time dealing with conflicts and relational issues in the team
  • Low morale
  • Passive aggressive behaviour like talking behind people’s backs, complaining, game playing and teasing
  • At it’s worse people in a toxic team can experience mental health issues like stress and depression because it’s not a nice place to work
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